The right road

 Do you ever feel like your life took a wrong turn and you have no idea how to get back on the right road? Sometimes I feel that way.  I am almost done with my master's degree in curriculum and instruction.  I have worked hard to finish this second degree (my first is a bachelor's in math with extra classes to be able to teach), but the only thing I feel like I have learned is that I do not agree with the American education system and I really don't want to teach in a classroom, especially not math.  So then the question becomes, "what now?"  Well, at this particular moment, I am back to homeschooling three of my kids.  If I stick with that, which we plan on, that will take 5 or so more years.  But then what?  

I always want a plan.  I want to know every detail of what I should be doing and I think that each "should be doing" is a permanent fix.  Unfortunately for me, that isn't the way life works.  Sometimes, God gives us a plan for a long time.  Sometimes, He just asks us to trust each day and follow each step.  That's where I am.  I am on the right road as long as I am following Jesus each step.  Sometimes, I wander into the ditch, but for the most part I focus on letting Him keep me on the right road.  

Strangling you with your past is something that Satan excels at.  Most people wouldn't even say I have a bad one.  Nothing really sticks out.  But I know my sin.  I know my failures.  So I listen to that lie that tells me I can't get back on the right road, even though I am on it as long as I am walking with Jesus.  Sometimes that lie cripples me.  Sometimes, I just want to pull the covers over my head and give up.  But, for some reason, God doesn't give up on me and He is working through all the muck of the lies in my head to work all things together for my good and His glory.  

Lord, please use all that has been and will be in ways that make me more like You and spread Your Gospel to the ends of the earth.  Help me to stop being trapped in the lies that make it all about me and instead to keep it all about You.

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